I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
