think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
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I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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