im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
