No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
