Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
