so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
