They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
