Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
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