You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
