I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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