If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Randomize