? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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