Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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