i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
it's like iHOP with fire
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
