He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
what day is it and did you see me today?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
