But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
