Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
