Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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