Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
