when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
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