oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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