just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
