you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
