Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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