I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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