I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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