i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
