i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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