i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize