At least make sure they are 18
Why
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
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It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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