I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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