Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
