i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
