no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
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besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
i out mim tonsoeep
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