How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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