Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
