it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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