Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
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Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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