We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
