I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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