Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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