i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize