based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
