i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
