the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
