So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
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Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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