ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize