Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Randomize
