I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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