omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
